Monday, September 30, 2019
Mother courage and her children Essay
By Bertolt Brecht, and Hamlet, by William Shakespeare, are both studies in the political activities and the history and evolution of a society. These plays hold political views that have survived for centuries. In response to the statement made about Bertolt Brecht, Mother Courage and Her Children and Hamlet both make a statement on politics and war. Mother Courage and Her Children was a story of a woman and her children during the Thirty Years War. Early on in the play, Mother Courage predicted that her children would meet their deaths due to the personality characteristics each had; Eilif would die for his bravery, Kattrin for her kindness, and Swiss Cheese for his honesty. As the play progressed, Swiss Cheese did die because of his honesty and Kattrin for her kindness. Mother Courageââ¬â¢s downfall was that she sought to profit from the war to provide for her family, turning a blind eye to her childrenââ¬â¢s safety. The play ended with Mother Courage moving on with the regiment. Brechtââ¬â¢s Mother Courage and Her Children has an intellectual anti-war message. War in every society is inevitable. However, Brecht took a biased view on this social reality, proclaiming an anti-war message. This message is intellectual because Brecht kept the emotion to a minimum. For example, when Swiss Cheese was executed, the event played out off stage (Brecht 41-42; scene 3). This kept the audience focused on the message Brecht was trying to get across. Brechtââ¬â¢s anti-war message also revealed itself in one of the major themes of the play, war as business. Mother Courage profited from the war, but it cost her her children. Mother Courage was so intent on profiting from the war and providing for her family that her children fell by the wayside. For example, Mother Courage does not pawn her wagon to pay for her son, Swiss Cheeseââ¬â¢s, freedom from captivity. She was planning to do this, but when she realized that Swiss Cheese threw the cash box, the box she was planning to get the money from to buy her wagon back after she pawned it to save her son, into the river, she decided that she could not pawn her wagon. Swiss Cheese was then executed (Brecht 38-41; scene 3). Hamlet is the story of a ghost, Prince Hamlet, and a corrupt uncle. At the beginning of the play, Prince Hamlet sees the ghost of his father, the King of Denmark. Hamlet then discovers that his uncle, Claudius, murdered his father in order to become king and marry Hamletââ¬â¢s mother. The ghost orders Hamlet to seek revenge on Claudius. Hamlet first determines Claudiusââ¬â¢s guilt, then seeks to destroy him. Claudius fears for his life, and plots to kill Hamlet. At the end of the play, Hamlet is cut with a poisoned sword and dies, but not before exacting revenge on Claudius for his fatherââ¬â¢s murder. Shakespeareââ¬â¢s Hamlet also has political ties. Politics provide the setting and characterization for the play. The political situation in the play is apparently unstable. Claudius, Hamletââ¬â¢s uncle and now King of Denmark, was a wicked politician under whose rule the state of Denmark was suffering. The deceased King Hamlet, Hamletââ¬â¢s father, was a strong ruler, therefore the state was in good health. The presence of King Hamletââ¬â¢s ghost was indicative that ââ¬Å"something is rotten in the state of Denmark. â⬠(Shakespeare 1. 4, 100) Hamlet therefore spent the entire play seeking revenge on his uncle. Like in Mother Courage and Her Children , war played a role, but not in the same way. There was an internal war between the members of the royal family in Hamlet. Claudius wanted power, therefore he murdered King Hamlet. This is an inevitable characteristic of human evolution, survival of the fittest. It is human nature to succeed in life. Like it was said in the statement about Bertolt Brecht, this characteristic of human nature is not susceptible to change. It is even seen today in corporate America; people scratch and claw their way to success, no matter who they have to hurt in the process. Such as Mother Courage profited monetarily from the Thirty Years War, Claudius profited politically from the murder of King Hamlet. At the beginning of the play, Claudius revels in his new position as King of Denmark. He thanks his subjects for their support and denies Hamletââ¬â¢s request to return to the university in Wittenberg (Shakespeare 1. 2). Claudius enjoyed being king until the end of the play when Hamlet avenged his fatherââ¬â¢s death. The quote about Bertolt Brecht that stated that theater is a political statement and that society is not susceptible to change because of history and evolution is alive and well in both William Shakespeareââ¬â¢s Hamlet and Bertolt Brechtââ¬â¢s Mother Courage and Her Children. War, between both countries and states and family members, is inevitable due to human evolution. Certain individuals profit from these types of wars, such as Mother Courage profiting from the Thirty Years War and Claudius profiting from the death of King Hamlet. War is inevitable, it is how one copes with war that makes the difference. ? Brecht, Bertolt. Mother Courage and Her Children. New York: Arcade Publishing, 1941/1994. ? Miller, Arthur. Death of a Salesman. In ed. Gerald Weales. The Viking Critical Library. New York: Penguin Books, 1949/1967. ? Shakespeare, William. The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark. In ed. Barbara A. Mowat and Paul Werstine. The New Folger Library: Shakespeare. New York: Washington Square Press, 1603/1992.
Sunday, September 29, 2019
Human Computer Interaction Individual Report Essay
We as a group we have been set tasks to evaluate an existing system and capture the required improvements that should be made to the system through comprehensive research using the required methods to improve usability of the system. As a group we are to understand the user and capture its needs through numerous of method for example, questionnaire. I within my group decided to evaluate the system (www.pogo.com) as it was thought to inspect the system thoroughly from which some major errors were confronted. To check if these were to reflect the user of the system and that it was effecting the lack of consistent and comprehensive movement from within the site i considered to evaluate the system using ââ¬ËShneidermanââ¬â¢s 8 Golden Rulesââ¬â¢ . The evaluation method constructed errors which were found are to be tested with the users and get feedback via the talk aloud and the questionnaire from which I with my group will be able to test the system and capture the user requirements Content Page Paragraph Name Page Number Summary 1 Methods chosen, why 3 Problems Encountered 3 Feedback from users 4 Achievements from the assessment 4 Conclusion/ Recommendations 5 Bibliography/ references 6 Books 6 Web sites 6 Methods chosen, why The interface that chose to evaluate and redesign, was www.pogo.com as this website was not that appealing to me and I think it needs improvements as it is aimed at a family audience. To evaluate the system www.pogo.com it was required to test the system and check if the system had any major error or were they minor problems, in order for me to do this I decided to evaluate the system using the 8 golden rules of Shneidermanââ¬â¢s. The method was used to evaluate the system as this enabled me to test the colour, resolution, text, layout etcâ⬠¦ and I thought this method was very useful to appoint out the usability problem that the system was carry to the users. To carry out the evaluation I was first to understand the method and then continue to explore this with the system (www.pogo.com) . The methods used for capturing user requirements were Observation, Questionnaire and talk aloud. These methods were chosen because they were Easy to explore with the system, Cost Effective and Time Effective. Problems Encountered The major problems encountered during the task tests were to find the appropriate user to tackle these tasks. As the methods used were demanding a wide range of user that fitted in the categories of the novice, intermediate and expert users, it was difficult to address the needs of certain user as all categories were involved and from each users view was taken into consideration. There were novice, intermediate and expert that took the task which was a real heap for me as this would help me redesign the interface to fulfil the usability needs. Feedback from users From asking the users to complete the tasks more knowledge was gained for what users expected within a website, from this I was able to point out the like and dislike. From this I also acknowledge that the users prefer their website to be attractive so it is enjoyable to use and users also like to take minimum amount of steps to complete a particular task. The results which I obtained were very useful for redesigning the website. I found out what different usability needs were and what features users wanted to be remained on the website, and any others which they thought required changing. From this information I chose to do a paper based prototype for my system because it was simple, cheap and provided quick feedback from the user. Achievements from the assessment Having completed the assessment I feel that I would be able to explain the usability of any website/interface and from this I am able to identify usability problems such as psychological problems of the system, as well as being able to evaluate any system in depth. From this assessment I have also knowledge how I would explain various methods of capturing user requirements, stating the advantages and disadvantages of the method. Conclusion/ Recommendations If I was to do the assessment again, I would use Shneidermanââ¬â¢s Eight Golden Rules to identify the usability of the system, as I found them very useful both to understand and apply towards the website. I would also use the ââ¬ËTen Heuristicsââ¬â¢ to evaluate the website and I would have a great image of usability in evaluating the system. If given a chance in the future to redesign the system I would choose to do a low fidelity prototype but as well as this I would prefer to redesign the website in a high fidelity prototype provided that I am given extra time than provided in my first attempt. The reason for this would be that the users would see the prototype in a low fidelity and will be given a chance then to test the system via a high fidelity prototype. As I only had five users to complete the set task, I was unable to get different views from users to make changes to the redesign. In the future I would ask more users (maybe 10 different users) to complete at least three different tasks. By doing this, the users would experience more interaction with the system www.pogo.com and would comment more on the results they would achieve from the task, and also whether they were able to complete the task accurately, in a minimum amount of time. Bibliography/ references Books User and task analysis for interface design By: JoAnn T. Hackos Janice C. Redish Human computer interaction 3rd addition By: Alan Dix, Janet Finlay, Gregory D. Abowd, and Russell Beale Effective methodology for the study of HCI By: J. Kirakowski and M. Corbett Human-Computer Interaction, 2nd edition, By: Alan Dix, Janet Finlay, Gregory Abowd, Russel Beale Web sites http://www.useit.com/papers/heuristic/ Lecture 3/ Usability/Evaluation Methods/Talk Aloud/Page 15 http://www.ic.sunysb.edu/Class/est571go/ta.html http://hcibib.org/tcuid/ End Page CHI2310 Human Computer Shelley Wolfson
Saturday, September 28, 2019
Summary of Tuesday’s with Morrie
Summary of Tuesdays with Morrie Tuesdays with Morrie, is a look a man dying from a terminal illness and how he chose to deal with his prognosis. The book was written by Morrie Schwartzââ¬â¢s former student, Mitch Albom. Mitch was busy with his career, but one night while watching Nightline in 1995, he rediscovered his old professor, dying with Lou Gehrigââ¬â¢s disease. Lou Gehrigââ¬â¢s disease is also known as ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosisis). ALS is a fatal degenerative disease of the nervous system marked by progressive muscle weakness and atrophy. It is a form of motor neuron disease. Morrie did what most people who are aging and dying usually donââ¬â¢t do; he decided to face death with inner dignity and he taught a young man how to live through his impending death. Morrie was a perfect example of the continuity theory. The continuity theory emphasizes that people age best when they are able to view the changes in later life inside an existing thought and behavior pattern. Aging best, in my opinion is not just how long you live, but how you live. Morrieââ¬â¢s behaviors were; to talk about death, maintain social connections by spending time with friends and family, remain mentally active as long as he could, write and mentor Mitch, his former student. Morrieââ¬â¢s thought pattern changes were to write about death, make decisions as to how he was going to live out his remaining time, and anticipate the physical limitations that would occur as the disease progressed. He believed the more you anticipated the loss of physical powers, not just because of a disease, but also because of age, that causes physical limitations, or the end of physical abilities, the easier the adjustment would be. Morrie anticipated the total end of his physical abilities. Morrieââ¬â¢s behaviors and thought about the changes that took place in his life and physical body was the reason he could face his journey from life to death. Anyone going in to the field of gerontology will have to deal with aging clients and the prospect of their clients impending death. Tuesdayââ¬â¢s with Morrie brought a realization of how society talks about living, but does not deal with the unavoidable reality of dying which is something all human beings must do. Morrie did not lose his ability to love in the midst of losing his battle with ALS. It was interesting for someone to be so candid about death, how it felt to know that one is dying, and using this as a platform to share with others the journey. Morrie was the epitome of knowing how to die. He possessed altruistic qualities, the belief that acting for the benefit of others is right and good, no matter what oneââ¬â¢s own circumstances may be. Morrie was generative in life and generative in the midst of facing his own mortality. His generative behavior was shaped by his unique life experiences, including experiences of suffering. Leaving a legacy to succeeding generations was tied to suffering experiences, to the personal and communal identities that emerged from suffering, to the importance of intergenerational and intragenerational community, and to what men believed others needed from them. Morrie told a story about a male wave that was worried about crashing into the ocean. The male wave met a female wave that was happily head toward the shore. The male wave said you are going to crash into the shore and you will no longer exist. The female wave said I am not just a wave; I am part of the ocean. Morrie did not feel he was just an individual human being, but a part of the whole universe. It will be important for anyone working with the elderly to have the ability to understand from that individualââ¬â¢s point of view. It also impacted me personally because death is something we all have to face one day. Itââ¬â¢s part of every human beingââ¬â¢s journey. Unknown, but still a road all must travel. Morrie taught Mitch how to live while he was dying. Although Morrie was dying he still felt death was a mystery. Although death is unknown to all human beings, how people choose to deal with it is a decision they can make. The unknown is a fearful thing because it is not familiar. I like Morrieââ¬â¢s experience because he did not deal with the mystery of death, but with the things that were known to him. He used all of the resources he had in order to deal with his situation. Morrieââ¬â¢s use of crystallized intelligence,; the ability of his knowledge grow by taking every piece of life wisdom he had and applied it to his journey into death. His use of semantic memory, the basic facts of life he was able to maintain, helped him to rationally think about his impending inability to speak, go to the bathroom on his own, use his hands, or walk. Morrie dealt with how he would feel; the depression that would set in and he thought about how to handle his emotions as his body shuts down. Tuesdayââ¬â¢s With Morrie made me think about death, and how I would handle it. Now death comes in many ways; one may be in a fatal accident, natural death, which I consider unexpected; or by a terminal illness that may be quick or drag on for months maybe even years. However it comes, death remains a mystery. I hope I can deal with the known fact that all must die; and no matter how death comes, that my life counted and that I did what I was suppose to do while here, and I helped others to learn how to live by my life, and ultimately by my death like Morrie.
Friday, September 27, 2019
Critical factors for successful implementation of ERP systems Research Paper
Critical factors for successful implementation of ERP systems - Research Paper Example Organizations are struggling to integrate new systems, introduce different ways to survive, and acquire the latest strategy possible. Successful system integration efforts provide competitive edge. The Information revolution has spawned numerous technologies geared towards automating the office. Information Systems has created new paradigm shifts in organizational processes. The trend in organizations is implementing Enterprise Resource Planning and Information Systems solutions such as groupware and enterprise applications, for example databases or shared repositories, intranets, workflow, imaging systems, and other customized applications. Technological advancement and continuous innovations have motivated organizations and businesses to react to changes in the global competition. Organizations have to reorganize, reevaluate and reprogram outdated functions and activities, and realign them to the present trends for improvement and competition. Personnel and field people, ordinary employees, including middle-level and top management have to refocus along the line of technological innovations. IT applications provide easy handling of strategic operations and other supervisory and managerial functions of the organization. External and internal environments in organizations are becoming complex; thus they are handled with a globally-oriented brand of management, with the aid of Information Technology. Corporate management is now handling a global-scale brand of management, requiring a different kind of strategy, much distinct from traditional management. Changes in the system demand new ways to integrate functions in the organization. Successful system integration efforts provide competitive edge. Motivations to integrate revolve around technological issues and globalization. Organizations however have limited options, and have to migrate to newer technologies (Mische,
Thursday, September 26, 2019
Biography of Alan Stillman Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words
Biography of Alan Stillman - Essay Example The original intention of TGI Fridayââ¬â¢s was to provide people with a neighbor friendly bar where they could grab a hamburger or French fries. Through Alanââ¬â¢s innovation, the joint started serving burgers on toasted English muffin in an effort to create an in-house atmosphere. The results were tremendous. Alan had underestimated the influence serving food would have. In an effort to lure ladies, the joint began giving out burgers for free during end month. The argument was that many girls pay could not sustain them over the whole month. The joint quickly grew in popularity prompting the hiring of security guards in only three months of operation. Increased hordes of customers meant a significant restructuring for the joint. The foods had to be changed to adjust to menus that were quick to prepare. The second TGI Fridayââ¬â¢s location was in Tennessee. A lad from Memphis approached Alan with the intention of buying a franchise. At the moment, Alan understood little about franchises. The counterpart offered to help with the idea of a fifty/fifty ownership stance. With the success of the second outlet, more people partnered with Alan resulting in about six outlets, in the country. This was a rapid growth of the enterprise. Soon, interested parties who possessed more capital than Alan approached with an intention of setting up similar franchises in Dallas. The Dallas partner was Scoggin and Henrion. The Dallas premises was twice the size of the original TGI Fridayââ¬â¢s and raked in an annual figure of $2,000,000. A shift in Stillmanââ¬â¢s business took place in the year 1971. The economy was experiencing a downtrend. People from all sorts of places were chasing Alan around trying to buy the interest. A prospective customer offered one million dollars, which Alan took gladly.
Assignment 2 Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 500 words - 12
Assignment 2 - Essay Example Yet, the actual experience of smelling a rose cannot merely be contained and explained through this comprehensive body of information. This in essence is the Qualia problem. Jackson illustrates the inadequacy of physicalism through couple of examples. He uses the ââ¬Ëknowledge argumentââ¬â¢ in describing the case of the exceptionally sighted Fred. Fred actually sees two colors within the conventional red spectrum. In other words, just as a normal human eye can distinguish between yellow and blue clearly and consistently, Fred is able to identify two colors within red ââ¬â red1 and red2. The nomenclature contains ââ¬Ëredââ¬â¢ as a common term, but it does not mean Fred sees two shades of red. To him the two are as distinct as yellow and blue are for a normal human being. This much is a brief account of the physical facts of the phenomenon. But crucially, it is a poor substitute for what it is to experience those two different colors. Even the analogy of yellow and blue give a conceptual understanding but no clue as to what the two reds might look like. This is the major shortcoming of physicalism and hence the introduction of qualia into the discussion. I totally agree with Jacksonââ¬â¢s emphasis on qualia and its centrality to discussing sensory experience. Physicalism, though, has its utility, in that, it helps document and describe sensory phenomena for scholarly analysis. But it is ultimately limited in capturing the real experience as and when it occurs to a human subject. In my view modern psychology could benefit by incorporating qualia into its therapeutic models. It is widely understood that psychological states like depression and anxiety have their origins in perception. Two different people perceive the same sort of event in two different ways. Their reaction to these events is in turn dictated by their perception. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is aimed toward rectifying the patientââ¬â¢s distorted perceptions of self, others, circumstances and the
Wednesday, September 25, 2019
Second Klan through the lens of gender Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words - 1
Second Klan through the lens of gender - Essay Example She brands them ââ¬Å"petite Middle classâ⬠in the midst of wealthy recipients. Macleanââ¬â¢s work provides an understanding of both social and cultural issues, and a broad view of the persons behind the evolution of the Ku Klux Klan movement. The author argues that the economy had an impact in the collapse of the Klan in the mid 1920s (Jenkins 218). This argument contrasts that of several historians who indicated that the collapse of the Klan attributed to the moral plus financial abuses of Klan leaders. Evidence of murder plus rape of Klan Members and leaders was an indication of the cause of the decline of the group. The author argues that the New Deal and its several programs attempt to lessen the diminutive bourgeoisies economic decline weakened the Klan and other groups. The argument does not regard the possibility of an economic fall in the period of depression. The post war era must not have an impact on the economic down fall of the Klan (Jenkins 219). Macleanââ¬â¢s argument on the significance of gendered analysis emanates from her observation of various changes in the roles of women plus men during the era of the Klan movement. There were traditional roles laid by the Ku Klux Klan movement that the women were to follow. In the Ku Klux Klan, there existed rules that guided the clan, including the role that women and men had to play in the participation of clan activities. The Klan expected women to play a prime role of raising respectful white children with Christian faith and educating the children that the white race was greater than other races (Jenkins 220). However, several women defied the traditions by taking part in struggles for rights to participate in voting and inclusion, in the movement. These gender role changes cause Maclean to declare gendered analysis of the movement a fundamental aspect for revealing various occurrences. Several women fought for their inclusion the affairs of the movement, and found necessary
Tuesday, September 24, 2019
Education Plan for Fourth Grade Class Assignment
Education Plan for Fourth Grade Class - Assignment Example About five percent are reading below grade level and approximately 10 percent are reading above their grade level; there are a few children with diagnosed learning disabilities who have been mainstreamed. There are three fourth grade classes that will join together for the unit on history and we have chosen to study World War II with special emphasis on the Holocaust. The curriculum will work to make the events of the Holocaust relevant to the children. 1. Type of Curriculum Harriet Sepinwall states that John Goodlad created five types of curricula that are suitable for teaching fourth graders about the Holocaust. The five curricula are: ideal, formal, perceived, operational and experimental. The operational design is what has been chosen for this educational plan. The operational classroom speaks to the function of the classroom and what is actually being done. The curriculum is ââ¬Å"defined and assessed by lesson plans, observational reports, and videotapes of instructional situa tionsâ⬠(Sepinwall 4). By using this type of curriculum it will allow students to be immersed in the Holocaust in order to make it more relevant to them. Activities will include reading, drawing, group work and group reading. 2. Goals for the Curriculum We were able to purchase 51 books about World War II and/or the Holocaust. The objective of our program is to use the story of the Holocaust to teach about tolerance, respect for differences, and to help children understand prejudice. Some of our goals include: 1. Students will read books that include the feelings and emotions of children and adults who experienced the Holocaust. 2. To talk about the Holocaust and WWII as they pertain to prejudice and people who were different. 3. To help children identify situations today that are similar to what the Jews experienced during that time. 4. To discuss how children in school are treated and mistreated and talk about what could be done about those children who are mistreated. 3. Act ivities Because we will have four classes coming together to learn about this time in history, we have planned both online and offline activities. As an example, we will start by talking to students about the Holocaust and what it was and how it fit into World War II. Children will read several stories during the course of two weeks from our new library of books and they will present short reports about what they read. We will discuss the information presented in terms of what happens today in similar situations. We will create literature circles so that children can talk about these experiences and they will learn about the Jewish experience and gain more knowledge about WWII and how it is relevant to the Holocaust. We will have the children look at a world map and find where these activities took place. Children will also talk about Hitler and how he came to power and how he lost. Another topic that will come up will be freedom. We will talk about freedom and how we experience fre edom today and what would happen if those freedoms were taken away. Although we would like to take the children to the Holocaust Museum, we are not sure whether this will be a possibility with the schoolââ¬â¢s budget. An alternative plan is to take them to the museum website because there is a lot of information to read and discuss. We can also take the children on a virtual tour of the Anne Frank house with important information about what happened there (one of the books we
Monday, September 23, 2019
The Importance of Ethics to Sustainable Growth in Engineering Research Paper - 1
The Importance of Ethics to Sustainable Growth in Engineering Enterprise - Research Paper Example Findings reveal that Chinaââ¬â¢s rules and regulations related to ethical standards are not implemented strictly but it has given more importance to CSR programmes. UK on the other hand has ignored CSR programmes but is successful in incorporating various employee training programmes. While UK companies apply technology to monitor whether ethics are practised in the workplace, Chinese companies use compliance programmes. Theft of asset is a serious problem in UK while the problem of deficiency of stringent laws causes lack of ethical practices in workplace. Chief CSR officer is given the responsibility of making profit making decisions and monitoring ethical standards. The green officer along with board members takes the authoritative decisions in the company. Employees both in UK and China want ethical code of conducts in the office. However, Chinese employees believe that small firms are unable to properly implement ethics in the workplace. According to Daft (2012), data analysis is a process of evaluating the study on the basis of findings and literature review. The project is primarily based on secondary data accompanied by the interview conducted on six Chinese Engineering Companies. The secondary data is collected from journals and books of eminent authors. The primary data in the form of questionnaire survey aims at providing knowledge regarding the existing conditions of the companyââ¬â¢s policies and the perspectives of the employees about ethical standards. Since work culture in UK represents the work environment in western companies and China represents eastern work culture, wide contrasts are noted in the study. It has been observed in the UK that titles like ââ¬Å"chartered engineerâ⬠, ââ¬Å"engineering techniciansâ⬠, ââ¬Å"information and communications technology techniciansâ⬠and ââ¬Å"incorporated engineerâ⬠are granted by the Engineering Council UK (Basart, Farrà ºs and Serra, 2015). The incorporated engineers of UK are
Sunday, September 22, 2019
Growth and Decline Essay Example for Free
Growth and Decline Essay Areas of growth and decline in the primary, secondary and tertiary classifications of business activities Firstly the primary sector, obtain or produces raw goods. The secondary sector manufactures and constructs goods. Finally the tertiary sector provides services to businesses and/or individuals. Over time whole sectors can grow or decline. Absolute growth or decline means that on its own a sector is getting bigger or smaller. If this type of decline happened continuously, one day a sector would disappear. Relative growth or decline means a sector is doing better or worse compared with other sectors. It may be growing relative to other sectors but still not doing very well. Or it may be declining relative to other sectors, but doing quite well on its own. Overall the primary and secondary sector is declining and the tertiary sector is growing. This is because we as a country are becoming more of a service culture. The primary and secondary sector has decreased because we can now use machinery to do certain jobs that people used to do and so people have to find work elsewhere in the tertiary sector. The primary sector has decreased rapidly through time from 1980 to 2002 and the employment rate for primary industries has decreased by over 65% going from 3. 6% to 1. 4%. This is because people no longer produce their own food or own animals for meat and so as the years went on people started to trade the food that they produced and the animals they owned for other products which leads on to the tertiary sector. However within the sector the output has risen from. Fishing fleets, coal mining and quarrying are all examples of areas in the primary sector that has declined. This is because machinery can do most jobs that people used to do, foreign industries also became more competitive and imports such as coal became more affordable. As the availability of coal declined in the UK, and also became more expensive to extract more coal was imported. This led to a further decline in primary sector employment in the UK. The primary sector has although increased in its organic food production, wind farming, fish farming and oil and natural gas extraction. The number of organic producers has risen from 6,038 organic producers in 2004 to 7,567 organic producers in 2009 this is because the demand for organic food has increased as more and more people want to eat food without artificial fertilizers and pesticides. However even with this increase the primary sector is declining compared to the secondary and tertiary sectors as employment for the primary sector in 2008 is only 1. 6% of the UK whereas the secondary sector has an employment rate of 17. 6% in 2008 and the tertiary sector has an employment rate of 80. % in 2008. This shows that the primary sector is declining along with the secondary sector but at a much more drastic rate. The secondary sector is doing better than the primary sector as pointed out in my last paragraph however is declining largely compared to the tertiary sector. Between 2005 and 2008 the secondary sector was on the rise as employment in manufacturing increased and the output of the secondary sector increased. H owever as the recession hit, the secondary sector saw a decline of output from 23% in 2008 to 6. 5% at the start of 2009. The areas hit most were industries metal products, transport (engineering) and construction. Over 140,000 jobs were lost in the motor industry, BAE systems cut 500 jobs and SANYO closed its factory which made televisions ââ¬â ever since no factory in Britain made televisions. Later in 2009 the decline started to slow down but hasnââ¬â¢t improved much since as companies are still making cut backs. Going back to 2005-2008 the areas that were most successful in the secondary sector were the food and drink industry, drugs and pharmaceuticals, weapons, ammunitions, energy, electrical and optical equipment and finally paper and publishing.
Saturday, September 21, 2019
Mass Media Sociological Insight Media Essay
Mass Media Sociological Insight Media Essay According to Gordon Marshall, mass media is a medium through which a message can be transmitted to a large number of people. Mass media is one such form of communication in which there is no personal contact between the senders and receivers of the message. The message is generated from one source and communicated to multiple audiences at the same time. Examples of mass media include; radio, television, movies, advertising, internet, newspapers, magazines, so on and so forth. These medium are increasing rapidly with the technological advancements. Over the period of time it can be said that the importance of different mediums changed. For instance, at one point in time, newspapers were the main source of information but the trend shifted and televisions became the dominant source. (Marshall, 1998). The history of mass media is long, but in general is dated back to the innovation of printing press in the late fifteenth century. With the rise in printed material, it became easier to co mmunicate with large number of people like never before. In the period of post world war II mass media saw a sturdy introduction of radio, television and the video technology. They instantaneously became popular among the masses. Lately, world witnessed the revolution of internet. This medium over took the popularity and place of all others introduced before it. The progression in technology, lined the way for the evolution of mass media in general, (Bhattacharya). The history of mass media in Pakistan begins with the print media, as it was the first medium of mass communication in the country. Jang, Dawn and Anjam were the very first newspapers that were published for the masses. The period from 1958 to 1988 press was subjected to strict government regulations. Almost all of the content needed government approval during the dictatorial rule. After this regime ended, some of these constraints were lifted up, but still press was not completely free of scrutiny. In 1949, Radio Pakistan was officially launched in Karachi which was controlled by the government through Pakistan Broadcasting Corporation. The early decades of Pakistans television history were subjugated by PTV (Pakistan Television), which was launched in 1964. For many years television broadcasting was monopolized by the state owned network. When the private television broadcasters were permitted, Pakistan saw a boom in the television channels. Functions of the Mass media In any society the mass media plays an important role, one that includes a number of related aspects, although we can perhaps characterize these roles in terms of three primary aspects: Entertainment Information (Education) News production The linking-theme of the above is information and having established the fundamental importance of the idea of the mass media as information-providers or educators (a source of secondary socialization), it means that we can concentrate on this idea when considering the way information about the social world is both selected and presented. The mass media links the government of a nation and its people together. The government tries to get support of its people through media by explaining and promoting its policies, for example Musharraf used media to gain support for his referendum. Almost every single person accesses the different forms of media in order to get updates on the current world situation. The media also performs surveillance, that is, it informs us about terrorism, natural disasters and transmits information that is useful in daily lives. The media is also said to perform mobilization function which is very important for developing societies both culturally and technologi cally. It also socializes people and provides entertainment and according to Functionalists media encourages solidarity among its members and promotes national advancement, while Social Conflict says it manipulates individual so that they can be kept under false consciousness by the bourgeoisie. Let us now take a look at different sociological theories regarding the content of the mass media. Pluralist Perspective From this perspective, the mass media involves different forms of bias, since in any situation where there are differing viewpoints which cannot all be effectively represented, bias is bound to occur. Pluralists does not see the mass media advocating any single ideology or point of view in the society but instead stresses on the diversity of views and opinions represented in the mass media, the multiplicity of forms they take and the range of opportunities the general audience or public has to influence their content. In general terms, the range of media available in society covers most of the possible viewpoints in the society. The audience selects those views that most closely accord with their own and declines those that dont. The media responds to audiences demand. In this respect, if the audience is politically conservative then the media will have to respond to this. From this perspective, the main sources of media bias come not from the ideological beliefs of owners, but simply from technical constraints imposed upon various media. In this way media is similar to any other commodity in a market-led society, where the consumer is sovereign, and the products on sale reflect the general laws of market forces and respond to the needs of the consumers. The Pluralists suggest that there really is a plurality of different views on offer to the consumer. Consumers are free to select those views they agree with and reject those with which they disagree. In basic terms, if you dont like watching Geo, you can definitely shift to Expresss version for the news of the day. Secondly, there is no clear evidence that the mass media directly changes peoples beliefs or attitudes. On the contrary, from this perspective the role of the media is of the one confirming the prejudices and views of the consuming audience. For example, the television dramas we see today often reinforce the prevalent views on women in society. They usually portray the role of women as a submissive one who has to conform to whatever rules imposed on them. Usually the Pakistani women like watching it as they relate to the actors portrayal of helplessness. The Mass-manipulative Model This model is usually associated with the Frankfurt School of the 1930s-1950s and with the work of Marcuse in particular. Their starting point is the phenomena of the mass which by the 20th century existed at all levels. This was the advent of the mass society (that is, a form of social organization in which the informal bonds of community had effectively broken-down under the blitz of mass economic production). In this complex, persistently-changing world the mass media are considered to be the one social institution that can help the individual to make sense of the world. The mass media became a tool of the ruling class to intentionally manipulate and control the minds of the masses, effectively removing the possibility of critical thought from them and perpetuating their subservience. It presents a hazy, one-dimensional view of the nature of society and social relationships that supports a certain world-view that supports the Capitalist system. Pakistan has a large history of being manipulated by the military dictators who according to their discretion kept media under emergency. These dictators define social reality by imposing their ideology, through their control of the media, on a mass of socially-isolated individuals and by excluding other possible interpretations from exposure through the media. The most palpable evidence for the model comes in relation to patterns of media ownership. As we have seen, newspaper, television and radio, books and magazine publishing is dominated by a relatively small number of owners. Where competition between companies exists it is likely to be over market share rather than over fundamental ideological disagreements about the nature of society. On the contrary, all of the major forms of media conform to a relatively narrow, consensual view of social reality that can be characterized as politically and socially traditionalist. There is evidence to suggest that owners do try to directly control the content of the media, as Lord Northcliffe stated, God made people read so that I could fill their brains with the fact and later tell them who to love, whom to hate and what to think. Selling is at the heart of the mass media and has been since its beginning. Recently the Omore ice cream was launched in Karachi. To win sales from Walls, Omore was publ icized in various soaps. The Hegemonic Model The hegemonic model represents an attempt to create a much suppler Marxist model of news production and media content, one that avoids some of the rigidities of the manipulative model while also being highly critical of the role of the mass media in Capitalist society. Antonio Gramcsi used it to describe the ideological leadership that is achieved through winning consent rather than through force or coercion. From this perspective, the role of the mass media, as a cultural institution is not to help maintain the position of any individual or group. Rather, its role is to police the cultural system and to help maintain rule boundaries. It reflects the values of the ruling class not because of the intervention of the owners but because of the fact that most of the editors and journalists are drawn from the ruling class. One way this is carried-out is through what hegemonic Marxists call agenda setting (certain facts are prioritized more than others which are considered trivial) and Gate keeping (certain facts are deliberately ignored and kept under cover). Functionalist Perspective According to functionalists media plays an important role in the society. It occupies leisure time, helps in the socialization process, it enforces social norms; confers status and media increases social solidity by presenting common view of a society. Socializing can promote religious as well as patriotic interactions, uniting believers. Media often endorse proper behavior by showing what happens to people who violate societal expectations and mass media confer status on people, organizations, and public issues and singles out one issue or person to become significant from thousands of others. Media and secondary socialization The Mass Media assists communication between the sender of information and the children. Media, especially television, effect childrens and adults behavior in different ways. Some programs like Sesame Street or Dora the explorer are very helpful with lots of information for the children. Children can learn to speak and also do things such as singing, reading and pronouncing words in English. The media can teach norms and values by way of symbolic reward and punishment for different kinds of behavior as represented in the media. It stresses on what is acceptable and what is not. Another view is that it is a learning procedure whereby we all learn how to act in particular situations and the expectations which go with a given role or status in a society. Thus the media are continually offering pictures of life and models of behavior in advance of actual experience. (McQuail, 2005) Media and Sensationalism Whenever image building has been in question, the media has at all times been an exclusive and sophisticated ground to play on. However, these days, the media has become only the storytelling medium and journalists have become the key players in tale-making and identity building. Sensationalism in media is commonly defined as changing the emphasis from facts to sensation that is how the news is conveyed or reported now focuses more on sensationalism than actual research. However, now in Pakistan media is known only for exploitation and manipulation of the issues that are of national interest and consequently, the public has come to distrust the media of Pakistan. Going to media for your daily dose of news and entertainment is a painful yet unavoidable task, unavoidable because you have to turn yourself to at least one of the mediums daily and know where you stand, and painful because you cannot just accept that the media is treating society so harshly that any observer from any part of the world is reasonable in stereotyping us Pakistanis as human cockroaches or terrorists. It is a delusion that media is playing a chief role in bringing about a positive change in society, or pressing or trying to press all the people in power to protect human rights, or even bringing about, or triggering the long awaited revolution. The reality is, that media most of the time attacks on the masses emotionally to divert their attention from the actual matter that should be catered. Taking for example Raymond Davis case: Mohsin Hamids article The game preserve in Dawn on 13th February, 2011 compared Americans to hunters who pay people with diplomatic immunity to kill Pakistanis; So what is going on? Who is Raymond Davis, and what are people like him doing in Pakistan? Ive read articles likening him to Rambo and RoboCop. But I believe another Hollywood film franchise metaphor is more apt. Predator. The Raymond Davis affair has brought home what should have been obvious to us Pakis tanis for a long time. Pakistan has become a game preserve, a place where deadly creatures are nurtured, and where hunters pay for the chance to kill them. How is that, that whenever something goes wrong in the world, we are blamed? The international media portrays Pakistanis as a nation of people devoid of moral standards. And in turn Pakistani media adds all the spices to the recipes of international media and strengthens the bias by giving authentications against its own people. It is true that a good government with an adversary press becomes a great government. But an oppositional or adversarial role does not mean borrowing the viewpoint of others. Adversary press is a press that is ready to face those in power for the sake of those who are oppressed, exploited. Does Pakistan have such a media? Does it even fulfill the most basic thing that media caters to: mass communication? In the days following this headline an article, A day of thrilling developments likely, by Amir Wasim was published on Dawn.com, which sketched out that the meetings had been full of feverish political activities which showed no sign of slowing down. The article went on to talk about the fireworksà ¢Ã¢â ¬Ã ¦ predicted to start in the courtroom with part of the tense drama, played out at a meeting between Prime Minister Yusuf Raza Gilani and the army chief. This is not the only example of how the headlines in the newspapers say something and the actual article says something totally irrelevant. Unfortunately as the medias cape is growing so is the wave of sensationalism. In this era every news is the breaking news and every story is offered in the most dramatic and sensational way possible, whether it is justified or not. As Pakistan Electronic Media Regulatory Authority (PEMRA) came into being, it was believed that it is competent enough to reinstate the democratic pride of media as well as the people but in turn big media was taken to be business with big money. One example of this is the talk shows; to attract more viewership the appreciated talk shows have now turned into cockfights. It is true that every debate begins with the people and it progresses but then ends in abstraction. Anchor, having the last word, uses the opportunity to convey a personal message; sometimes summing up the fight and sometimes giving an absolute irrelevant end to the show. Another example of extreme sensationalism and emotional stimulant in Pakistani media is of the murder case of Sialkot brothers. All the horrible things that were done to the brothers were recorded and broadcasted on various TV channels repeatedly to arouse the public. The headlines used to describe the case were also emotionally arousing which stirred up almost everyone, from the users of Facebook who made pages to condemn the act, to those who came out on streets to protest. Also the fact that any and every footage is now broadcasted on television has given an edge to the wrong-doers, who now can make a video of anything and present their deed as something very noble and get it broadcasted on all the news channels. This is the media giving them new ideas to worship their god of grudges and distortion. A lot of unrest is created and a lot of problems have worsened because of the sensationalism in reporting and selective reporting of certain issues by the media. A great deal of the mass media produces very one sided views on terrorism and extremism and also where Pakistans relationship with India is concerned. The ICC World Cup 2011 semifinal that was played between Pakistan and India was termed as war and Mohali takkar (Mohali Clash) instead of a game of cricket; many called it war of peace. Just to make stories juicier, print and electronic media play around with certain facts and inflate issues. It is highly unfortunate that the Pakistani media has tilted towards making more and more money and for that focuses more onà sensationalà issues, because they attract the most viewership and hence makes more profit. The medias job is to make information available to the masses, and not to mislead them or spur violence and extreme measures. Due to corrupted and distorted information that media presents it is very much held responsible for extremist reactions and behaviors which are increasing by the day.
Friday, September 20, 2019
Danny Santiagos Famous All Over Town :: Famous All Over Town
Danny Santiago's Famous All Over Townà à à à à à à à à When I was little I remember driving across country, going to Florida, and past neighborhoods that were anything but mine. They had old houses that looked like they were going to fall down any minute, real trashy looking. In Colorado, my house was nice and always kept up. I sat in the car wondering what kind of people lived in those run down places and what they were like. The answers came to me years later when I read the book, Famous All Over Town, by Danny Santiago. The main character, Chato, is a young Hispanic boy living in a neighborhood like the ones I saw when I was little. After reading the book, although I never thought I would have anything in common with people who lived like that, I learned that Chato and I have do have similarities, but we have more differences. There aren't very many similarities between Chato and I, but there is one, and it's a big one. We both have families that love us. Lena, Chato's sister takes care of him after he gets home from the hospital. Then he begins to think about his family and how glad he is to be home. "Lena loved me, my mom loved me, and my father loved me, it seemed" (45). All of Chato's family loves him and he loves being with them. In my house, you would find the same kind of environment and I can relate to some of Chato's family life. However, Chato's family is not always nice to him. His family has many problems, such as everyone keeping secrets from each other and everyone lieing to each other. For example, Chato's father is having an affair and everyone knows about it, but they all keep it from Chato. When he finds out he is very mad at himself and things he is dumb for not knowing, while everyone else does. "She knew, they knew, the whole damn town knew, except only dumb, stupid me" (l46). In my fa mily, however, everyone is honest and you would never see anyone keeping something that important from the others. Another example of how Chato's family is different, is shown when Chato is having a bellyache and his father things that he is faking it. He tells him, "Shut-up, crybaby-coward" (26). His father is not being very nice to him because he is sick.
Thursday, September 19, 2019
How Could I Tell? - Personal Narrative Essay -- Papers
How Could I Tell? - Personal Narrative "I'm afraid you may never have a desk job again. Employers prefer younger people! They shouldn't - but they do. You must be more flexible". The man at the unemployment office had looked embarrassed. He'd still got his job. Age for age, responsibility for responsibility. The job was the only difference between us.But it was a big difference. In a way I really missed my desk. It was comfortable. It had been part of me for so many years. It had brought in money - just enough - to keep things going for just me and her. But now it was over. Chapter closed,Dumped. Did I care? For a while I cared a lot, yes, then less. Gradually the me that was defined by a desk gave way to a me that was free.The bills were overdue and there were ugly scenes. To be honest, I accepted the job that day just to show willing. Of course the pay was a joke - Ã £10 in a day, if I was lucky. But, once I was out in the fresh air, somehow it just didn't seem to matter any more. The world seemed full of possibilities; unexplained, undecided and only just round the corner. The country air felt fresh in my lungs, the sun beamed down and my whole body tingled with anticipation. I had not felt so good for years. The heavy bag on my unfit shoulders seemed light as a feather. The twisting country lane stretched out in front of me with its high hedge bordering with a riot of white foxgloves and sweet scented creamy honeysuckle. Songs from hidden birds in the hedgerow crowded the country air, lifting me up, leading me on. Just a small country lane - but for me it held the promise of new and better futures. Each stride pushe... ... link that had grown so quickly between this lady, her mountains and myself was much stronger and ultimately irresistible. I reached up and enclosing her face between my two hands, drew her down to return her kiss. In a small part of my consciousness, I felt the coldness of the mountains begin to return. Her breathing was shallow and slowly, with gentle tenderness, our bodies moulded together. But still how was i to tell her about the job,or rather no job. Whilst wrapped in her warm hand with her lavender sent creeping up her body into my nostrils i recalled the wrathe of the words said by the man at the unemploymet office,as they seemed to run circles in my head. "I'm afraid you may never have a desk job again. Employers prefer younger people! They shouldn't - but they do. You must be more flexible".
Wednesday, September 18, 2019
George Orwellââ¬â¢s 1984 and Stalinââ¬â¢s Russia Essay -- Compare Contrast Ess
à à à à à In George Orwellââ¬â¢s 1984, the strategies used by Oceaniaââ¬â¢s Political Party to achieve total control over the population are similar to the ones employed by Joseph Stalin during his reign. Indeed, the tactics used by Oceaniaââ¬â¢s Party truly depicts the brutal totalitarian society of Stalinââ¬â¢s Russia. In making a connection between Stalinââ¬â¢s Russia and Big Brothersââ¬â¢ Oceania, each Political Party implements a psychological and physical manipulation over society by controlling the information and the language with the help of technology. à à à à à Many features of Orwell's imaginary super-state Oceania are ironic translations from Stalinââ¬â¢s Russia. In Oceania, the Party mainly uses technology as the chief ingredient to implement a psychological manipulation over society by controlling the information they receive. An example of this is the big screen television set up in every personââ¬â¢s home, and the poster all over the city. The giant ââ¬Å"telescreenâ⬠in every citizenââ¬â¢s room blasts a constant stream of propaganda designed to make the failures and short successes of the Party appear to be glorious. In Winston Smithââ¬â¢s apartment, this ââ¬Å"instrumentâ⬠is always on spouting propaganda and constantly brain washing the peoplesââ¬â¢ mind. In actual fact, ââ¬Å"It could [only be] dimmedâ⬠¦ there [is] no way of shutting it offâ⬠. In doing this, the Political Party is in complete control over the citizensââ¬â¢ mind, blasting what they want each individual to think (Orwell, 6). They psychologically stimulate each individuals mind, limiting their ability to think and have a mind of their own. In a similar way, Stalinââ¬â¢s created ââ¬Å"The Posterâ⬠and The Pravda (the Russian newspaper controlled by the government during Joseph Stalin's regime) to twist and manipulate the minds of people into believing that what they were saying was absolutely right and truth. Using this power, Stalin and his regime would get people to do anything for them. (Basgen, 2010) à à à à à The creation of gigantic posters is one of the most psychological manipulating tactics used in Oceania and Russia with the enhancement and help of technology. In Oceania, one could find ââ¬Å"A colored posterâ⬠¦with the face of a manâ⬠¦ [Whose] eyes fallowed you about when you movedâ⬠. The caption in the poster says that ââ¬Å"Big Brother Is Watching Youâ⬠(Orwell, 5). In placing poster like these all over Oceania, people are constrained and restricted to their actions.... ...ince and manipulate the way people act, think, and execute. Works Cited Basgen, Brian. Soviet History. Marxists.org 2010. Web. 21 May 2015. https://www.marxists.org/reference/archive/stalin/index.htm "Critical Reception." Nineteen Eighty-Four: Past, Present, and Future. Patrick Reilly. Boston: Twayne Publishers, 1989. 11-23. Twayne's Masterwork Studies 30. Gale Virtual Reference Library. Web. 5 May 2015. Franklin, Simon and Emma Widdis, eds. National Identity in Russian Culture: An Introduction. Cambridge: Cambridge UP, 2004. Orwell, George. 1984. New York, NY: Published by Signet Classic, 1977. Print. Platt, Kevin M. F. and David Brandenberger, eds. Epic Revisionism: Russian History and Literature as Stalinist Propaganda. Madison: U of Wisconsin P, 2006. Internet Sources Consulted "George Orwell." Famous Authors. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 May 2015. "George Orwell (1903-1950)." BBC News. BBC, n.d. Web. 16 May 2015. Alder, Peter. "Stalin: Man of Steel." Prod. Guido Knopp. Dir. Oliver Halmburger. Perf. Ed Herrman. The History Channel, 2003. Videocassette. Youtube. 15 Mar. 2013. Web. 12 May 2015. .
Tuesday, September 17, 2019
Earned value management Essay
What is meant by an integrative project management process and why is this so important? What are the pitfalls if such an approach is not taken? The main goal of the integrative project management process is to take a project and design it around the specific needs of a company. This process can sometimes force companies to change how they conduct business, who they advertise too and how they attract new customers. What makes the integrative project management so important to companies is success. When a company spends millions of dollars to implement a new strategy, they want to ensure things go smoothly, especially if they are changing the direction of their business. These projects can take a bit longer to complete because the project manager will have to take the time to get to know the company, and how the conduct business, but in the end a business is usually more successful if they use an integrative project management strategy. When companies donââ¬â¢t follow this stringy, and go with a generic project template it usually ends up wasting time, money and resources. The final project, even though it is complete wonââ¬â¢t meet their needs and usually more money is spent on small adjustments to finalize the project. I see this at work all the time, now one ever looks at our computer system as a whole, and designs a plan around what we already have in place. This can become frustrating because we end up with three and four different networks, and none of them ever seem to work correctly. Why is the traditional project management approach less effective when project scope is not clearly understood? Provide examples to illustrate your points. Our text refers to the triple constraint of scope, schedule, and budget. Itââ¬â¢s a triple constraint in the sense that variability on any one of the constraints affects the other two. Effective project management must maintain scope, schedule and budget in a relative equilibrium or balance. That is, scope change, either to expand or contract it, will by necessity affect schedule and budget. For example, if an organization wants to make more narrow the scope of a project that is underway, it should require fewer resources and/or less time to accomplish. On the other hand, if the organization wants to expand the scope, it will have a direct effect on resources and schedule in that it will require more resources to finish on schedule, or the schedule will have to slip to accommodate finite resources spread across more project tasks. If project scope is poorly or improperly defined at project initiation, the schedule and budget will also be less valid because of the triple constraint nature of scope, schedule, and budget. Later in the project management timeline when additional requirements may expand the scope, schedule and budget will be impacted. For example, when a former employer was planning a new downtown office building as a company headquarters, they expanded the scope of the project to include a retail shopping and restaurant area. This necessitated arrangements with the city government to expand an adjacent public parking structure and allow a below-street-level tunnel between the building and the parking structure. This scope change resulted in a six-month schedule slip and required additional resources. Wk1 summary (Monday) Typical first week; rather steep curve as the learning teams form, I get into a ââ¬Å"battle rhythmâ⬠so I can meet my individual and team requirements, and I figure out what software/tools I need to get the work done. This is only my second online course, and I am reminded that one of the advantages of being a ground student in a particular cohort is that the learning teams stay more or less intact from one course to the next, and we can really hit the ground running. Online is a different dynamic. Reading load is okay so far; I have some familiarity with the material since I have been working in a project environment for some time now.
Monday, September 16, 2019
The Twilight Saga 3: Eclipse Chapter 1. ULTIMATUM
Bella, I don't know why you're making Charlie carry notes to Billy like we're in second grade if I wanted to talk to you I would answer the You made the choice here, okay? You can't have it both ways when What part of ââ¬Ëmortal enemies' is too complicated for you to Look, I know I'm being a jerk, but there's just no way around We can't be friends when you're spending all your time with a bunch of It just makes it worse when I think about you too much, so don't write anymore Yeah, I miss you, too. A lot. Doesn't change anything. Sorry. Jacob I ran my fingers across the page, feeling the dents where he had pressed the pen to the paper so hard that it had nearly broken through. I could picture him writing this?scrawling the angry letters in his rough handwriting, slashing through line after line when the words came out wrong, maybe even snapping the pen in his too-big hand; that would explain the ink splatters. I could imagine the frustration pulling his black eyebrows together and crumpling his forehead. If it'd been there, I might have laughed. Don't give yourself a brain hemorrhage, Jacob, I would have told him. Just spit it out. Laughing was the last thing I felt like doing now as I reread the words I'd already memorized. His answer to my pleading note?passed from Charlie to Billy to him, just like second grade, as he'd pointed out?was no surprise. I'd known the essence of what it would say before I'd opened it. What was surprising was how much each crossed-out line wounded me?as if the points of the letters had cutting edges. More than that, behind each angry beginning lurked a vast pool of hurt; Jacob's pain cut me deeper than my own. While I was pondering this, I caught the unmistakable scent of a smoking burner rising from the kitchen. In another house, the fact that someone besides myself was cooking might not be a cause for panicking. I shoved the wrinkled paper into my back pocket and ran. I made it downstairs in the nick of time. The jar of spaghetti sauce Charlie'd stuck in the microwave was only on its first revolution when I yanked the door open and pulled it out. ââ¬Å"What did I do wrong?â⬠Charlie demanded. ââ¬Å"You're supposed to take the lid off first, Dad. Metal's bad for microwaves.â⬠I swiftly removed the lid as I spoke, poured half the sauce into a bowl, and then put the bowl inside the microwave and the jar back in the fridge; I fixed the time and pressed start. Charlie watched my adjustments with pursed lips. ââ¬Å"Did I get the noodle's right?â⬠I looked in the pan on the stove?the source of the smell that had alerted me. ââ¬Å"Stirring helps,â⬠I said mildly. I found a spoon and tried to de-clump the mushy hunk that was scalded at the bottom. Charlie sighed. ââ¬Å"So what's all this about?â⬠I asked him. He folded his arms across his chest and glared out the back windows into the sheeting rain. ââ¬Å"Don't know what you're talking about,â⬠he grumbled. I was mystified. Charlie cooking? And what was with the surly attitude? Edward wasn't here yet; usually my dad reserved this kind of behavior for my boyfriend's benefit, doing his best to illustrate the theme of ââ¬Å"unwelcomeâ⬠with every word and posture. Charlie's efforts were unnecessary?Edward knew exactly what my dad was thinking without the show. The word boyfriend had me chewing on the inside of my cheek with familiar tension while I stirred. It wasn't the right word, not at all. I needed something more expressive of eternal commitment?. But words like destiny and fate sounded hokey when you used them in casual conversation. Edward had another word in mind, and that word was the source of the tension I felt. It put my teeth on edge just to think it to myself. Fiance. Ugh. I shuddered away from the though. ââ¬Å"Did you miss something? Since when do you make dinner?â⬠I asked Charlie. The pasta lump bobbed in the boiling water as I poked it. ââ¬Å"Or try to make dinner, I should say.â⬠Charlie shrugged. ââ¬Å"There's no law that says I can't cook in my own house.â⬠ââ¬Å"You would know,â⬠I replied, grinning as I eyed the badge pinned to his leather jacket. ââ¬Å"Ha. Good one.â⬠He shrugged out of the jacket as if my glance had reminded him he still had it on, and hung it on the peg reserved for his gear. His gun belt was already slung in place?he hadn't felt the need to wear that to the station for a few weeks. There had been no more disturbing disappearances to trouble the small town of Forks, Washington, no more sighting of the giant, mysterious wolves in the ever-rainy woods?. I prodded the noodles in silence, guessing that Charlie would get around to talking about whatever was bothering him in his own time. My dad was not a man of many words, and the effort he had put into trying to orchestrate a sit-down dinner with me made it clear there were an unusual characteristic number of words on his mind. I glanced at the clock routinely?something I did every few minutes around this time. Less than a half hour to go now. Afternoons were the hardest part of my day. Ever since my former best friend (and werewolf), Jacob Black, had informed on me about the motorcycle I'd been riding on the sly?a betrayal he had devised in order to get my grounded so that I couldn't spend time with my boyfriend (and vampire), Edward Cullen?Edward had been allowed to see me only from seven till nine-thirty p.m., always inside the confines of my home and under the supervision of my dad's unfailingly crabby glare. This was an escalation from the previous, slightly less stringent grounding that I'd earned from an unexplained three-day disappearance and one episode of cliff diving. Of course, I still saw Edward at school, because there wasn't anything Charlie could do about that. And then, Edward spent almost every night in my room, too, but Charlie wasn't precisely aware of that. Edward's ability to climb easily and silently through my second-story window was almost as useful as his ability to read Charlie's mind. Though the afternoon was the only time I spent away from Edward, it was enough to make me restless, and the hours always dragged. Still, I endured my punishment without complaining because?for one thing?I knew I'd earned it, and?for another?because I couldn't bear to hurt my dad by moving out now, when a much more permanent separation hovered, invisible to Charlie, so close on my horizon. My dad sat down at the table with a grunt and unfolded the damp newspaper there; within seconds he was clucking his tongue in disapproval. ââ¬Å"I don't know why you read the paper, Dad. It only ticks you off.â⬠He ignored me, grumbling at the paper in his hands. ââ¬Å"This is why everyone wants to live in a small town! Ridiculous.â⬠ââ¬Å"What have big cities done wrong now?â⬠ââ¬Å"Seattle's making a run for murder capitol of the country. Five unsolved homicides in the last two weeks. Can you imagine living like that?â⬠ââ¬Å"I think Phoenix is actually higher up in the homicide list, Dad. I have lived like that.â⬠And I'd never come close to being a murder victim until after I moved to his safe little town. In fact, was still on several hit lists?. The spoon shook in my hands, making the water tremble. ââ¬Å"Well, you couldn't pay me enough,â⬠Charlie said. I gave up on saving dinner and settled for serving it; I had to use a steak knife to cut a portion of spaghetti for Charlie and then myself, while he watched with a sheepish expression. Charlie coated his helping with sauce and dug in. I disguised my own clump as well as I could and followed his example without much enthusiasm. We ate in silence for a moment. Charlie was still scanning the news, so I picked up my much-abused copy of Wuthering Heights from where I'd left it this morning at breakfast, and tried to lose myself in the turn-of-the-century England while I waited for him to start talking. I was just to the part where Heathcliff returns when Charlie cleared his throat and threw the paper to the floor. ââ¬Å"You're right,â⬠Charlie said. ââ¬Å"I did have a reason for doing this.â⬠He waved his fork at the gluey spread. ââ¬Å"I wanted to talk to you.â⬠I laid the book aside; the binding was so destroyed that it slumped flat to the table. ââ¬Å"You could have just asked.â⬠He nodded, his eyebrows pulling together. ââ¬Å"Yeah. I'll remember that next time. I thought taking dinner off your hands would soften you up.â⬠I laughed. ââ¬Å"It worked?your cooking skills have me soft as a marshmallow. What do you need, Dad?â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, it's about Jacob.â⬠I felt my face harden. ââ¬Å"What about him?â⬠I asked through stiff lips. ââ¬Å"Easy, Bells. I know you're still upset that he told on you, but it was the right thing. He was being responsible.â⬠ââ¬Å"Responsible,â⬠I repeated scathingly, rolling my eyes. ââ¬Å"Right. So what about Jacob?â⬠The careless question repeated inside my head, anything but trivial. What about Jacob? What was I going to do about him? My former best friend who was now?what? My enemy? I cringed. Charlie's face was suddenly wary. ââ¬Å"Don't get mad at me, okay?â⬠ââ¬Å"Mad?â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, it's about Edward, too.â⬠My eyes narrowed. Charlie's voice got gruffer. ââ¬Å"I let him in the house, don't I?â⬠ââ¬Å"You do,â⬠I admitted. ââ¬Å"For brief periods of time. Of course, you might let me out of the house for brief periods of time now and then, too,â⬠I continued?only jokingly; I knew I was on lockdown for the duration of the school year. ââ¬Å"I've been pretty good lately.â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, that's kind of where I was heading with this?.â⬠And then Charlie's face stretched into an unexpected eye-crinkling grin; for a second he looked twenty years younger. I saw a dim glimmer of possibility in that smile, but I proceeded slowly. ââ¬Å"I'm confused, Dad. Are we talking about Jacob, or Edward, or me being grounded?â⬠The grin flashed again. ââ¬Å"Sort of all three.â⬠ââ¬Å"And how do they relate?â⬠I asked, cautious. ââ¬Å"Okay.â⬠He sighed, raising his hands as if in surrender. ââ¬Å"So I'm thinking maybe you deserve a parole for good behavior. For a teenager, you're surprisingly non-whiney.â⬠My voice and eyebrows shot up. ââ¬Å"Seriously? I'm free?â⬠Where was this coming from? I'd been positive I would be under house arrest until I actually moved out, and Edward hadn't picked up any wavering in Charlie's thoughts?. Charlie held up one finger. ââ¬Å"Conditionally.â⬠The enthusiasm vanished. ââ¬Å"Fantastic,â⬠I groaned. ââ¬Å"Bella, this is more of a request than a demand, okay? You're free. But I'm hoping you'll use that freedom?judiciously.â⬠ââ¬Å"What does that mean?â⬠He sighed again. ââ¬Å"I know you're satisfied to spend all your time with Edward?â⬠ââ¬Å"I spend time with Alice, too,â⬠I interjected. Edward's sister had no hours of visitation; she came and went as she pleased. Charlie was putty in her capable hands. ââ¬Å"That's true,â⬠he said. ââ¬Å"But you have other friends besides the Cullens, Bella. Or you used to.â⬠We stared at each other for a long moment. â⬠When was the last time you spoke to Angela Weber?â⬠he threw at me. ââ¬Å"Friday at lunch,â⬠I answered immediately. Before Edward's return, my school friends had polarized into two groups. I liked to think of those groups as good vs. evil. Us and them worked, too. The good guys were Angela, her steady boyfriend Ben Cheney, and Mike Newton; these three had all very generously forgiven me for going crazy when Edward left. Lauren Mallory was the evil core of the them side, and almost everyone else, including my first friend in Forks, Jessica Stanley, seemed content to go along with her anti-Bella agenda. With Edward back at school, the dividing line had become even more distinct. Edward's return had taken its toll on Mike's friendship, but Angela was unswervingly loyal, and Ben followed her lead. Despite the natural aversion most humans felt toward the Cullens, Angela sat dutifully beside Alice every day at lunch. After a few weeks, Angela even looked comfortable there. It was difficult not to be charmed by the Cullens?once one gave them the chance to be charming. ââ¬Å"Outside of school?â⬠Charlie asked, calling my attention back. ââ¬Å"I haven't seen anyone outside of school, Dad. Grounded, remember? And Angela has a boyfriend, too. She's always with Ben. If I'm really free,â⬠I added, heavy on the skepticism, ââ¬Å"maybe we could double.â⬠ââ¬Å"Okay. But then?â⬠He hesitated. ââ¬Å"You and Jake used to be joined at the hip, and now?â⬠I cut him off. ââ¬Å"Can you get to the point, Dad? What's your condition?exactly?â⬠ââ¬Å"I don't think you should dump all your other friends for your boyfriend, Bella,â⬠he said in a stern voice. ââ¬Å"It's not nice, and I think your life would be better balanced if you kept some other people in it. What happened last September?â⬠I flinched. ââ¬Å"Well,â⬠he said defensively. ââ¬Å"If you'd had more of a life outside of Edward Cullen, it might not have been like that.â⬠ââ¬Å"It would have been exactly like that,â⬠I muttered. ââ¬Å"Maybe, maybe not.â⬠ââ¬Å"The point?â⬠I reminded him. ââ¬Å"Use your new freedom to see your other friends, too. Keep it balanced.â⬠I nodded slowly. ââ¬Å"Balance is good. Do I have specific time quotas to fill, though?â⬠He made a face, but shook his head. ââ¬Å"I don't want to make this complicated. Just don't forget about your friends?particularly Jacob.â⬠It took me a moment to find the right words. ââ¬Å"Jacob might be?difficult.â⬠ââ¬Å"The Blacks are practically family, Bellaâ⬠he said, stern and fatherly again. ââ¬Å"And Jacob has been a very, very good friend to you.â⬠ââ¬Å"I know that.â⬠ââ¬Å"Don't you miss him at all?â⬠Charlie asked, frustrated. My throat suddenly felt swollen; I had to clear it twice before I answered. ââ¬Å"Yes, I do miss him,â⬠I admitted, still looking down. ââ¬Å"I miss him a lot.â⬠ââ¬Å"Then why is it difficult?â⬠It wasn't something I was at liberty to explain. It was against the rules for normal people?human people like me and Charlie?to know about the clandestine world full of myths and monsters that existed secretly around us. I knew all about that world?and I was in no small amount of trouble as a result. I wasn't about to get Charlie in the same trouble. ââ¬Å"With Jacob there is?a conflict,â⬠I said slowly. ââ¬Å"A conflict about the friendship thing, I mean. Friendship doesn't always seem to be enough for Jake.â⬠I wound my excuse out of details that were true but insignificant, hardly crucial compared to the fact that Jacob's werewolf pack bitterly hated Edward's vampire family?and therefore me, too, as I fully intended to join that family. It just wasn't something I could work out with him in a note, and he wouldn't answer my calls. But my plan to deal with the werewolf in person had definitely not gone over will with the vampires. ââ¬Å"Isn't Edward up for a little healthy competition?â⬠Charlie's voice was sarcastic now. I leveled a dark look at him. ââ¬Å"There's no competition.â⬠ââ¬Å"You're hurting Jake's feelings, avoiding him like this. He'd rather be just friends than nothing.â⬠Oh, now I was avoiding him? ââ¬Å"I'm pretty sure Jake doesn't want to be friends at all.â⬠The words burned in my mouth. ââ¬Å"Where'd you get that idea, anyway?â⬠Charlie looked embarrassed now. ââ¬Å"The subject might have come up today with Billy?.â⬠ââ¬Å"You and Billy gossip like old women,â⬠I complained, stabbing my fork viciously into the congealed spaghetti on my plate. ââ¬Å"Billy's worried about Jacob,â⬠Charlie said. ââ¬Å"Jake's having a hard time right now?. He's depressed.â⬠I winced, but kept my eyes on the blob. ââ¬Å"And then you were always so happy after spending the day with Jake.â⬠Charlie sighed. ââ¬Å"I'm happy now,â⬠I growled fiercely through my teeth. The contrast between my words and tone broke through the tension. Charlie burst into laughter, and I had to join in. ââ¬Å"Okay, okay,â⬠I agreed. ââ¬Å"Balance.â⬠ââ¬Å"And Jacob,â⬠he insisted. ââ¬Å"I'll try.â⬠ââ¬Å"Good. Find that balance, Bella. And, oh, yeah, you've got some mail,â⬠Charlie said, closing the subject with no attempt at subtlety. ââ¬Å"It's by the stove.â⬠I didn't move, my thoughts twisting into snarls around Jacob's name. It was most likely junk mail; I'd just gotten a package from my mom yesterday and I wasn't expecting anything else. Charlie shoved his chair away from the table stretched as he got to his feet. He took his plate to the sink, but before he turned the water on to rinse it, he paused to toss a thick envelope at me. The letter skidded across the table and thunked into my elbow. ââ¬Å"Er, thanks,â⬠I muttered, puzzled by his pushiness. Then I saw the return address?the letter was from the University of Alaska Southeast. ââ¬Å"That was quick. I guess I missed the deadline on that one, too.â⬠Charlie chuckled. I flipped the envelope over and then glared up at him. ââ¬Å"It's open.â⬠ââ¬Å"I was curious.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm shocked, Sheriff. That's a federal crime.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh, just read it.â⬠I pulled out the letter, and a folded schedule of courses. ââ¬Å"Congratulations,â⬠he said before I could read anything. ââ¬Å"Your first acceptance.â⬠ââ¬Å"Thanks, Dad.â⬠ââ¬Å"We should talk about tuition. I've got some money saved up?â⬠ââ¬Å"Hey, hey, none of that. I'm not touching your retirement, Dad. I've got my college fund.â⬠What was left of it?and there hadn't been much to begin with. Charlie frowned. ââ¬Å"Some of these places are pretty pricey, Bells. I want to help. You don't have to go all the way to Alaska just because it's cheaper.â⬠It wasn't cheaper, not at all. But it was far away, and Juneau had an average of three hundred twenty-one overcast days per year. The first was my prerequisite, the second was Edward's. ââ¬Å"I've got it covered. Besides, there's lots of financial aid out there. It's easy to get loans.â⬠I hoped my bluff wasn't too obvious. I hadn't actually done a lot of research on the subject. ââ¬Å"So?,â⬠Charlie began, and then pursed his lips and looked away. ââ¬Å"So what?â⬠ââ¬Å"Nothing. I was just?â⬠He frowned. ââ¬Å"Just wondering what?Edward's plans are for next year?â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh.â⬠ââ¬Å"Well?â⬠Three quick raps on the door saved me. Charlie rolled his eyes and I jumped up. ââ¬Å"Coming!â⬠I called while Charlie mumbled something that sounded like, ââ¬Å"Go away.â⬠I ignored him and went to let Edward in. I wrenched the door out of my way?ridiculously eager?and there he was, my personal miracle. Time had not made me immune to the perfection of his face, and I was sure that I would never take any aspect of him for granted. My eyes traced over his pale white features; the hard square of his jaw, the softer curve of his full lips?twisted up into a smile now, the straight line of his nose, the sharp angle of his cheekbones, the smooth marble span of his forehead?partially obscured by a tangle of rain-darkened bronze hair?. I saved his eyes for last, knowing that when I looked into them I was likely to lose my train of thought. They were wide, warm with liquid gold, and framed by a thick fringe of black lashes. Staring into his eyes always made me feel extraordinary?sort of like my bones were turning spongy. I was also a little lightheaded, but that could have been because I'd forgotten to keep breathing. It was a face any male model in the world would trade his soul for. Of course, that might be exactly the asking price: one soul. No. I didn't believe that. I felt guilty for even thinking it, and was glad?as I was often glad?that I was the one person whose thoughts were a mystery to Edward. I reached for his hand, and sighed when his cold fingers found mine. His touch brought with it the strangest sense of relief?as if I'd been in pain and than pain had suddenly ceased. ââ¬Å"Hey.â⬠I smiled a little at my anticlimactic greeting. He raised our interlaced fingers to brush my cheek with the back of his hand. ââ¬Å"How was your afternoon?â⬠ââ¬Å"Slow.â⬠ââ¬Å"For me, as well.â⬠He pulled my wrist up to his face, our hands still twisted together. His eyes closed as his nose skimmed along the skin there, and he smiled gently without opening them. Enjoying the bouquet while resisting the wine, as he'd once put it. I knew that the scent of my blood?so much sweeter to him than any other person's blood, truly like wine beside water to an alcoholic?caused him actual pain from the burning thirst it engendered. But he didn't seem to shy away from it as much as he once had. I could only dimly imagine the Herculean effort behind this simple gesture. It made me sad that he had to try so hard. I comforted myself with the knowledge that I wouldn't be causing him pain much longer. I heard Charlie approaching then, stamping his feet on the way to express his customary displeasure with our guest. Edward's eyes snapped open and let our hands fall, keeping them twined. ââ¬Å"Good evening, Charlie.â⬠Edward was always flawlessly polite, though Charlie didn't deserve it. Charlie grunted at him, and then stood there with his arms crossed over his chest. He was taking the idea of parental supervision to extremes lately. ââ¬Å"I brought another set of applications,â⬠Edward told me then, holding up a stuffed manila envelope. He was wearing a roll of stamps like a ring around his littlest finger. I groaned. How were there any colleges left that he hadn't forced me to apply to already? And how did he keep finding these loophole openings? It was so late in the year. He smiled as if he could read my thoughts; they must have been very obvious on my face. ââ¬Å"There are still a few open deadlines. And a few places willing to make exceptions.â⬠I could just imagine the motivations behind such exceptions. And the dollar amounts involved. Edward laughed at my expression. ââ¬Å"Shall we?â⬠he asked, towing me toward the kitchen table. Charlie huffed and followed behind, though he could hardly complain about the activity on tonight's agenda. He'd been pestering me to make a decision about college on a daily basis. I cleared the table quickly while Edward organized an intimidating stack of forms. When I moved Wuthering Heights to the counter, Edward raised one eyebrow. I knew what he was thinking, but Charlie interrupted before Edward could comment. ââ¬Å"Speaking of college applications, Edward,â⬠Charlie said, his tone even more sullen?he tried to avoid addressing Edward directly, and when he had to, it exacerbated his bad mood. ââ¬Å"Bella and I were just talking about next year. Have you decided where you're going to school?â⬠Edward smiled up at Charlie and his voice was friendly. ââ¬Å"Not yet. I've received a few acceptance letters, but I'm still weighing my options.â⬠ââ¬Å"Where have you been accepted?â⬠Charlie pressed. ââ¬Å"Syracuse?Harvard?Dartmouth?and I just got accepted to the University of Alaska Southeast today.â⬠Edward turned his face slightly to the side so that he could wink at me. I stifled a giggle. ââ¬Å"Harvard? Dartmouth?â⬠Charlie mumbled, unable to conceal his awe. ââ¬Å"Well that's pretty?that's something. Yeah, but the University of Alaska?you wouldn't really consider that when you could go Ivy League. I mean, your father would want you to?â⬠ââ¬Å"Carlisle's always fine with whatever I choose to do,â⬠Edward told him serenely. ââ¬Å"Hmph.â⬠ââ¬Å"Guess what, Edward?â⬠I asked in a bright voice, playing along. ââ¬Å"What, Bella?â⬠I pointed to the thick envelope on the counter. ââ¬Å"I just got my acceptance to the University of Alaska!â⬠ââ¬Å"Congratulations!â⬠He grinned. ââ¬Å"What a coincidence.â⬠Charlie's eyes narrowed and he glared back and forth between the two of us. ââ¬Å"Fine,â⬠he muttered after a minute. ââ¬Å"I'm going to watch the game, Bella. Nine-thirty.â⬠That was his usual parting command. ââ¬Å"Er, Dad? Remember the very recent discussion about my freedomâ⬠He sighed. ââ¬Å"Right . Okay, ten-thirty. You still have a curfew on school nights.â⬠ââ¬Å"Bella's no longer grounded?â⬠Edward asked. Though I knew he wasn't really surprised, I couldn't detect any false note to the sudden excitement in his voice. ââ¬Å"Conditionally,â⬠Charlie corrected through his teeth. ââ¬Å"What's it to you?â⬠I frowned at my dad, but he didn't see. ââ¬Å"It's just good to know,â⬠Edward said. ââ¬Å"Alice has been itching for a shopping partner, and I'm sure Bella would love to see some city lights.â⬠He smiled at me. But Charlie growled, ââ¬Å"No!â⬠and his face flushed purple. ââ¬Å"Dad! What's the problem?â⬠He made an effort to unclench his teeth. ââ¬Å"I don't want you going to Seattle right now.â⬠ââ¬Å"Huh?â⬠ââ¬Å"I told you about that story in the paper?there's some kind of gang on a killing spree in Seattle and I want you to steer clear, okay?â⬠I rolled my eyes. ââ¬Å"Dad, there's a better chance that I'l l get struck by lightning than the one day I'm in Seattle?â⬠ââ¬Å"No, that's fine, Charlie,â⬠Edward said, interrupting me. ââ¬Å"I didn't mean Seattle. I was thinking Portland, actually. I wouldn't have Bella in Seattle, either. Of course not.â⬠I looked at him in disbelief, but he had Charlie's newspaper in his hands and he was reading the front page intently. He must have been trying to placate my dad. The idea of being in danger from even the most deadly of humans while I was with Alice or Edward was downright hilarious. It worked. Charlie stared at Edward for one second more, and then shrugged. ââ¬Å"Fine.â⬠He stalked off toward the living room, in a bit of a hurry now?maybe he didn't want to miss tip-off. I waited till the TV was on, so that Charlie wouldn't be able to hear me. ââ¬Å"What?,â⬠I started to ask. ââ¬Å"Hold on,â⬠Edward said without looking up from the paper. His eyes stayed focused on the page as he pushed the first application toward me across the table. ââ¬Å"I think you can recycle your essays for this one. Same questions.â⬠Charlie must still be listening. I sighed and started to fill out the repetitive information: name, address, social?. After a few minutes I glanced up, but Edward was now staring pensively out the window. As I bent my head back to my work, I noticed for the first time the name of the school. I snorted and shoved the papers aside. ââ¬Å"Bella?â⬠ââ¬Å"Be serious, Edward. Dartmouth?â⬠Edward lifted the discarded application a nd laid it gently in front of me again. ââ¬Å"I think you'd like New Hampshire,â⬠he said. ââ¬Å"There's a full complement of night courses for me, and the forests are conveniently located for the avid hiker. Plentiful wildlife.â⬠He pulled out that crooked smile he knew I couldn't resist. I took a deep breath through my nose. ââ¬Å"I'll let you pay me back, if that makes you happy,â⬠he promised. ââ¬Å"If you want, I can charge you interest.â⬠ââ¬Å"Like I could even get in without some enormous bribe. Or was that part of the loan? The new Cullen wing of the library? Ugh. Why are we having this discussion again?â⬠ââ¬Å"Will you just fill out the application, please, Bella? It won't hurt you to apply.â⬠My jaw flexed. ââ¬Å"You know what? I don't think I will.â⬠I reached for the papers, planning to crumple them into a suitable shape for lobbing at the trashcan, but they were already gone. I stared at the empty table for a moment, and then at Edward. He didn't appear to have moved, but the application was probably already tucked away in his jacket. ââ¬Å"What are you doing?â⬠I demanded. ââ¬Å"I sign your name better than you do yourself. You've already written the essays.â⬠ââ¬Å"You're going way overboard with this, you kno w.â⬠I whispered on the off chance that Charlie wasn't completely lost in the game. ââ¬Å"I really don't need to apply anywhere else. I've been accepted in Alaska. I can almost afford the first semester's tuition. It's as good an alibi as any. There's no need to throw away a bunch of money, no matter whose it is.â⬠A pained look tightened his face. ââ¬Å"Bella?â⬠ââ¬Å"Don't start. I agree that I need to go through the motions for Charlie's sake, but we both know that I'm not going to be in any condition to go to school next fall. To be anywhere near people.â⬠My knowledge of those first few years as a new vampire was sketchy. Edward had never gone into details?it wasn't his favorite subject?but I knew it wasn't pretty. Self-control was apparently an acquired skill. Anything more than correspondence school was out of the question. ââ¬Å"I thought the timing was still undecided,â⬠Edward reminded me softly. ââ¬Å"You might enjoy a semester or two of college. There are a lot of human experiences you've never had.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'll get to those afterward.â⬠ââ¬Å"They won't be human experiences afterward. You don't get a second chance at humanity, Bella.â⬠I sighed. ââ¬Å"You've got to be reasonable about the timing, Edward. It's just too dangerous to mess around with.â⬠ââ¬Å"There's no danger yet,â⬠he insisted. I glared at him. No danger? Sure. I only had a sadistic vampire trying to avenge her mate's death with my own, preferably through some slow and tortuous method. Who was worried about Victoria? And, oh yeah, the Volturi?the vampire royal family with their small army of vampire warriors?who insisted that my heart stop beating one way or another in the near future, because humans weren't allowed to know they existed. Right. No reason at all to panic. Even with Alice keeping watch?Edward was relying on her uncannily accurate visions of the future to give us advance warning?it was insane to take chances. Besides, I'd already won this argument. The date for my transformation was tentatively set for shortly after my graduation from high school, only a handful of weeks away. A sharp jolt of unease pierced my stomach as I realized how short the time really was. Of course this change was necessary?and the key to what I wanted more than everything else in the world put together?but I was deeply conscious of Charlie sitting in the other room enjoying his game, just like every other night. And my mother, Renee, far away in sunny Florida, still pleading with me to spend the summer on the beach with her and her new husband. And Jacob, who, unlike my parents, would know exactly what was going on when I disappeared to some distant school. Even if my parents didn't grow suspicious for a long time, even if I could put off visits with excuses about travel expenses or sturdy loads or illnesses, Jacob would know the truth. For a moment, the idea of Jacob's certain revulsion overshadowed every other pain. ââ¬Å"Bella,â⬠Edward murmured, his face twisting when he read the distress in mine. ââ¬Å"There's no hurry. I won't let anyone hurt you. You can take all the time you need.â⬠ââ¬Å"I want to hurry,â⬠I whispered, smiling weakly, trying to make a joke of it. ââ¬Å"I want to be a monster, too.â⬠His teeth clenched; he spoke through them. ââ¬Å"You have no idea what you're saying.â⬠Abruptly, he flung the damp newspaper onto the table between us. His finger stabbed the headline on the front page: DEATH TOLL ON THE RISE, POLICE FEAR GANG ACTIVITY ââ¬Å"What does that have to do with anything?â⬠ââ¬Å"Monsters are not a joke, Bella.â⬠I stared at the headline again, and then up to his hard expression. ââ¬Å"A?a vampire is doing this?â⬠I whispered. He smiled without humor. His voice was low and cold. ââ¬Å"You'd be surprised, Bella, at how often my kind are the source behind the horrors in your human news. It's easy to recognize, when you know what to look for. The information here indicates a newborn vampire is loose in Seattle. Bloodthirsty, wild, out of control. The way we all were.â⬠I let my gaze drop to the paper again, avoiding his eyes. ââ¬Å"We've been monitoring the situation for a few weeks. All the signs are there?the unlikely disappearances, always in the night, the poorly disposed-of corpses, the lack of other evidence?. Yes, someone brand-new. And no one seems to be taking responsibility for the neophyte?.â⬠He took a deep breath. ââ¬Å"Well, it's not our problem. We wouldn't even pay attention to the situation if it wasn't going on so close to home. Like I said, this happens all the time. The existence of monsters results in monstrous consequences.â⬠I tried not to see the names on the page, but they jumped out from the rest of the print like they were in bold. The five people whose lives were over, whose families were mourning now. It was different from considering murder in the abstract, reading those names. Maureen Gardiner, Geoffrey Campbell, Grace Razi, Michelle O'Connell, Ronald Albrook. People who'd had parents and children and friends and pets and jobs and hopes and plans and memories and futures?. ââ¬Å"It won't be the same for me,â⬠I whispered, half to myself. ââ¬Å"You won't let me be like that. We'll live in Antarctica.â⬠Edward snorted, breaking the tension. ââ¬Å"Penguins. Lovely.â⬠I laughed a shaky laugh and knocked the paper off the table so I wouldn't have to see those names; it hit the linoleum with a thud. Of course Edward would consider the hunting possibilities. He and his ââ¬Å"vegetarianâ⬠family?all committed to protecting human life?preferred the flavor of large predators for satisfying their dietary needs. ââ¬Å"Alaska, then, as planned. Only somewhere much more remote than Juneau?somewhere with grizzlies galore.â⬠ââ¬Å"Better,â⬠he allowed. ââ¬Å"There are polar bears, too. Very fierce. And the wolves get quite large.â⬠My mouth fell open and my breath blew out in a sharp gust. ââ¬Å"What's wrong?â⬠he asked. Before I could recover, the confusion vanished and his whole body seemed to harden. ââ¬Å"Oh. Never mind the wolves, then, if the idea is offensive to you.â⬠His voice was stiff, formal, his shoulders rigid. ââ¬Å"He was my best friend, Edward,â⬠I muttered. It stung to use the past tense. ââ¬Å"Of course the idea offends me.â⬠ââ¬Å"Please forgive my thoughtlessness,â⬠he said, still very formal. ââ¬Å"I shouldn't have suggested that.â⬠ââ¬Å"Don't worry about it.â⬠I stared at my hands, clenched into a double fist on the table. We were both silent for a moment, and then his cool finger was under my chin, coaxing my face up. His expression was much softer now. ââ¬Å"Sorry. Really.â⬠ââ¬Å"I know. I know it's not the same thing. I shouldn't have reacted that way. It's just that?well, I was already thinking about Jacob before you came over.â⬠I hesitated. His tawny eyes seemed to get a little but darker whenever I said Jacob's name. My voice turned pleading in response. ââ¬Å"Charlie says Jake is having a hard time. He's hurting right now, and?it's my fault.â⬠ââ¬Å"You've done nothing wrong, Bella.â⬠I took a deep breath. ââ¬Å"I need to make it better, Edward. I owe him that. And it's one of Charlie's conditions, anyway?â⬠His face changed while I spoke, turning hard again, statue-like. ââ¬Å"You know it's out of the question for you to be around a werewolf unprotected, Bella. And it would break the treaty if any of us cross over onto their land. Do you want us to start a war?â⬠ââ¬Å"Of course not!â⬠ââ¬Å"Then there's really no point in discussing the matter further.â⬠He dropped his hand and looked away, searching for a subject change. His eyes paused on something behind me, though his eyes stayed wary. ââ¬Å"I'm glad Charlie has decided to let you out?you're sadly in need of a visit to the bookstore. I can't believe you're reading Wuthering Heights again. Don't you know it by heart yet?â⬠ââ¬Å"Not all of us have photographic memories,â⬠I said curtly. ââ¬Å"Photographic memory or not, I don't understand why you like it. The characters are ghastly people who ruin each others' lives. I don't know how Heathcliff and Cathy ended up being ranked with couples like Romeo and Juliet or Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy. It isn't a love story, it's a hate story.â⬠ââ¬Å"You have some serious issues with the classics,â⬠I snapped. ââ¬Å"Perhaps it's because I'm not impressed by antiquity.â⬠He smiled, evidently satisfied that he'd distracted me. ââ¬Å"Honestly though, why do you read it over and over?â⬠His eyes were vivid with real interest now, trying?again?to unravel the convoluted workings of my mind. He reached across the table to cradle my face in his hand. ââ¬Å"What is it that appeals to you?â⬠His sincere curiosity disarmed me. ââ¬Å"I'm not sure,â⬠I said, scrambling for coherency while his gaze unintentionally scattered my thoughts. ââ¬Å"I think it's something about the inevitability. How nothing can keep them apart?not her selfishness, or his evil, or even death, in the end?.â⬠His face was thoughtful as he considered my words. After a moment he smiled a teasing smile. ââ¬Å"I still think it would be a better story if either of them had one redeeming quality.â⬠ââ¬Å"I think that may be the point,â⬠I disagreed. ââ¬Å"Their love is their only redeeming quality.â⬠ââ¬Å"I hope you have better sense than that?to fall in love with someone so?malignant.â⬠ââ¬Å"It's a bit late for me to worry about who I fall in love with,â⬠I pointed out. ââ¬Å"But even without the warning, I seem to have managed fairly well.â⬠He laughed quietly. ââ¬Å"I'm glad you think so.â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, I hope you're smart enough to stay away from someone so selfish. Catherine is really the source of all the trouble, not Heathcliff.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'll be on my guard,â⬠he promised. I sighed. He was so good at distractions. I put my hand over his to hold it to my face. ââ¬Å"I need to see Jacob.â⬠His eyes closed. ââ¬Å"No.â⬠ââ¬Å"It's truly not dangerous at all,â⬠I said, pleading again. ââ¬Å"I used to spend all day in La Push with the whole lot of them, and nothing every happened.â⬠But I made a slip; my voice faltered at the end because I realized as I was saying the words that they were a lie. It was not true that nothing had ever happened. A brief flash of memory?an enormous gray wolf crouched to spring, baring his dagger-like teeth at me?had my palms sweating with an echo of remembered panic. Edward heard my heart accelerate and nodded as if I'd acknowledged the lie aloud. ââ¬Å"Werewolves are unstable. Sometimes the people near them get hurt. Sometimes, they get killed.â⬠I wanted to deny it, but another image slowed my rebuttal. I saw in my head the once beautiful face of Emily Young, now marred by a trio of dark scars that dragged down the corner of her right eye and left her mouth warped forever into a lopsided scowl. He waited, grimly triumphant, for me to find my voice. ââ¬Å"You don't know them,â⬠I whispered. ââ¬Å"I know them better than you think, Bella. I was here the last time.â⬠ââ¬Å"The last time?â⬠ââ¬Å"We started crossing paths with the wolves about seventy years ago?. We had just settled near Hoquiam. That was before Alice and Jasper were with us. We outnumbered them, but that wouldn't have stopped it from turning into a fight if not for Carlisle. He managed to convince Ephraim Black that coexisting was possible, and eventually we made the truce.â⬠Jacob's great-grandfather's name startled me. ââ¬Å"We thought the line had died out with Ephraim,â⬠Edward muttered; it sounded like he was talking to himself now. ââ¬Å"That the genetic quirk which allowed transmutation had been lost?.â⬠He broke off and stared at me accusingly. ââ¬Å"Your bad luck seems to get more potent every day. Do you realize that your insatiable pull for all things deadly was strong enough to recover a pack of mutant canines from extinction? If we could bottle your luck, we'd have a weapon of mass destruction on our hands.â⬠I ignored the ribbing, my attention caught by his assumption?was he serious? ââ¬Å"But I didn't bring them back. Don't you know?â⬠ââ¬Å"Know what?â⬠ââ¬Å"My bad luck has nothing to do with it. The werewolves came back because the vampires did.â⬠Edward stared at me, his body motionless with surprise. ââ¬Å"Jacob told me that your family being here set things in motion. I thought you would already know?.â⬠His eyes narrowed. ââ¬Å"Is that what they think?â⬠ââ¬Å"Edward, look at the facts. Seventy years ago, you came here, and the werewolves showed up. You come back now, and the werewolves show up again. Do you think that's a coincidence?â⬠He blinked and his glare relaxed. ââ¬Å"Carlisle will be interested in that theory.â⬠ââ¬Å"Theory,â⬠I scoffed. He was silent for a moment, staring out the window into the rain; I imagined he was contemplating the fact that his family's presence was turning the locals into giant dogs. ââ¬Å"Interesting, but not exactly relevant,â⬠he murmured after a moment. ââ¬Å"The situation remains the same.â⬠I could translate that easily enough: no werewolf friends. I knew I must be patient with Edward. It wasn't that he was unreasonable; it was just that he didn't understand. He had no idea how very much I owed Jacob Black?my life many times over, and possibly my sanity, too. I didn't like to talk about that barren time with anyone, and especially not Edward. He had only been trying to save me when he'd left, trying to save my soul. I didn't hold him responsible for all the stupid things I'd done in his absence, or the pain I had suffered. He did. So I would have to word my explanation very carefully. I got up and walked around the table. He opened his arms for me and I sat on his lap, nestling into his cool stone embrace. I looked at his hands while I spoke. ââ¬Å"Please just listen for a minute. This is so much more important than some whim to drop in on an old friend. Jacob is in pain.â⬠My voice distorted around the word. ââ¬Å"I can't not try to help him?I can't give up on him now, when he needs me. Just because he's not human all the time?. Well, he was there for me when I was?not so human myself. You don't know what it was like?.â⬠I hesitated. Edward's arms were rigid around me; his hands were in fists now, the tendons standing out. ââ¬Å"If Jacob hadn't helped me?I'm not sure what you would have come home to. I have to try and make it better. I owe him better than this, Edward.â⬠I looked up at his face warily. His eyes were closed, and his jaw was strained. ââ¬Å"I'll never forgive myself for leaving you,â⬠he whispered. ââ¬Å"Not if I live a hundred thousand years.â⬠I put my hand against his cold face and waited until he sighed and opened his eyes. ââ¬Å"You were just trying to do the right thing. And I'm sure it would have worked with anyone less mental than me. Besides, you're here now. That's the part that matters.â⬠ââ¬Å"If it'd never left, you wouldn't feel the need to go risk your life to comfort a dog.â⬠I flinched. I was used to Jacob and all his derogatory slurs?bloodsucker, leech, parasite?. Somehow it sounded harsher in Edward's velvet voice. ââ¬Å"I don't know how to phrase this properly,â⬠Edward said, and his tone was bleak. ââ¬Å"It's going to sound cruel, I suppose. But I've come too close to losing you in the past. I know what it feels like to think I have. I am not going to tolerate anything dangerous.â⬠ââ¬Å"You have to trust me on this. I'll be fine.â⬠His face was pained again. ââ¬Å"Please, Bella,â⬠he whispered. I stared into his suddenly burning golden eyes. ââ¬Å"Please what?â⬠ââ¬Å"Please, for me. Please make a conscious effort to keep yourself safe. I'll do everything I can, but I would appreciate a little help.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'll work on it,â⬠I murmured. ââ¬Å"Do you really have any idea how important you are to me? Any concept at all of how much I love?â⬠He pulled me tighter against his hard chest, tucking my head under his chin. I pressed my lips against his snow-cold neck. ââ¬Å"I know how much I love you,â⬠I answered. ââ¬Å"You compare one small tree to the entire forest.â⬠I rolled my eyes, but he couldn't see. ââ¬Å"Impossible.â⬠He kissed the top of my head and sighed. ââ¬Å"No werewolves.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'm not going along with that. I have to see Jacob.â⬠ââ¬Å"Then I'll have to stop you.â⬠He sounded utterly confident that this wouldn't be a problem. I was sure he was right. ââ¬Å"We'll see about that,â⬠I bluffed anyway. ââ¬Å"He's still my friend.â⬠I could feel Jacob's note in my pocket, like it suddenly weighed ten pounds. I could hear the words in his voice, and he seemed to be agreeing with Edward?something that would never happen in reality. Doesn't change anything. Sorry.
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